05/27/23 Zero Day: It’s happened. The day has come. What day you ask? The day I became THAT guy. Who you ask? Sandals and socks guy! That’s who! You’re a little different, from being homeless, posting up in restaurants to get warm, charge your electronics, and to use the bathroom, to sitting in the town park, leaning against your backpack, watching people walk by, living the most simplest of lives… for now I can say, I don’t mind it. I’m in a puffy jacket and I’m watching all these people walk around in tank tops! It’s not warm! It’s sunny! Hence the socks and sandals! To each their own.
Today is the very last day I’ll be here in Julian, packages or no packages, leg improvement or not (it’s on the not side of things, not better, not worse) I need to get moving. Hoping I can bump my packages forward from here to Warner Springs or Idyllwild. Another 6-8 days with no sleeping pad, it’ll be fiiiine.
I’ve had some time to ruminate on how I started the trail and how I want it to go. In general, I have high expectations of myself, for this trail they’ve been even higher and I’ve been disappointed at how things have started… low miles, weird injury, too many zero days in a row etc. but this break reminded me that I am at the mercy of the trail, the only control I have is how I adapt and adjust, it’s uncomfortable but it’s in the uncomfortable moments that we stretch and grow, I’m like Stretch Armstrong at the moment. I’m reminded that I’m out here, doing something incredible, and that no matter how far I make it or don’t make it, the experience of the trail or three, “zero”, town days, all have value. My mental toughness has been tested.
What I have gleaned from this section and moment of time: Asking for help, being vulnerable, and admitting I can’t do everything on my own is a lesson I’m learning quickly, people want to share knowledge, give rides, help out… you just have to ask. I’m working on the asking bits. BlueJay and Koolaid, a pair of hikers showed up and I spent a day with them walking around town, picking their brains about how they are attacking the trail, I was on the right path, but their affirmations that crying under a bush and 2 hr. breaks from the mid day heat were completely normal, made me feel human again. They were a fountain of knowledge and encouragement, giving tips on how much water and food to carry at once. I’ve been carrying way too much! I’ve paired down my pack, it’s smaller and lighter and I’m happy about that!
One day at a time. Chunk by chunk.
On I grow.
PCT 20 23 